Episode 34: I Rebelled.
I straightened my back as much as possible, facing the Great Madam.
“Childbearing is a gift. No amount of effort from the individuals involved can change that. Especially not the gender. You may have given birth to a boy first, but that was merely a coincidence. There’s a high possibility that even with many children, they could all be girls. The probability of a child’s gender is 1/2, an absolute probability. There’s a 1/2 chance of a girl being born each time.”
It’s impossible to control the sex of a child without genetic manipulation.
My blunt and unapologetic words of criticism must have grated on the Great Madam’s nerves. A vein throbbed in her temple.
“And who do you think you are to say that? A mere wife?” The Great Madam glared at me with scorching intensity.
Whoa, scary. But I won’t back down. I don’t want someone who unconsciously denies Ati’s existence and forces a narrow-minded, individuality-crushing way of life near Ati. Even if the times are bad. I fully affirm Ati and my sisters.
“A mere wife? I consider myself a human being, equal to you. And Ati is also an equal human being. Someone’s wife, someone’s daughter, is first and foremost an individual, not the property of a house or its head. Besides, even if she’s still a young child, the words she hears can unconsciously remain within her and eventually bare their fangs.”
Even if she doesn’t understand now, she might remember the words when she grows up, learn her grandmother’s true intentions, and be hurt later. ‘She wouldn’t understand even if I told her’ is an adult’s ego.
“You and I are equal? What are you saying?” The Great Madam stood up abruptly, her hands tightly clutching a handkerchief or something.
“Noble daughters only become full-fledged when they give birth to a boy. You seem to misunderstand that. If a boy isn’t born, this house will die out. You need to fulfill that responsibility. I did. Besides, I am Tsanis’s mother. It’s only natural for a wife to respect her husband’s mother, isn’t it?” The Great Madam unleashed words filled with tremendous pressure and fury, like a one-hit kill. The housefolk in the room let out small screams.
However, I met her gaze with a calm face.
“No. Whether you give birth to a boy or a girl, or even if you don’t give birth at all, a woman’s value—no, a human’s value—doesn’t change. Besides, nobility isn’t about blood. It’s a position and a role. What’s needed for a position or role isn’t blood, but the ability to fulfill that role. It doesn’t matter if you’re a man or a woman, or whether they’re your own children or not. It’s true that only a man can inherit the Family Headship now, but frankly, that law itself is ridiculous. If Ati has the talent, Ati should inherit the Family Headship.”
When I clearly stated that, the Great Madam’s eyes widened. She had a face that said, “I’ve never even considered such a thing.” I picked up Ati, who was sitting next to me. And I pressed on.
“Also, a wife respecting her husband’s mother isn’t because the husband’s mother is in a superior position or older. It’s simply because she cares about her husband and tries to cherish his mother for his sake. Great Madam, you and I met for the first time today. I don’t know you well. I can’t respect someone I don’t know. Especially someone who looks down on me and Ati.”
I tightened my grip on Ati. I didn’t want to use such strong words in front of Ati. But I had to clearly deny the contempt for Ati that was expressed in front of her. If I didn’t deny it, it would be as if I had affirmed it even once. It would be meaningless to try to smooth things over with her later.
Moreover, if I left it alone, the Great Madam (that woman) might say the exact same things to Ati. I won’t let that happen.
The Great Madam pressed her lips into a straight line, her expression seething with anger. Was it because I argued back, because I didn’t respect her, or because I clearly rejected her? Or was it because of all of those things?
“Oh, and one more thing.” I gave one last push.
“The gender of the child is the man’s responsibility, you know? Did you know that? Even if you tell me, there’s nothing I can do about it. Please advise your husband.”
Well, the concept of genes isn’t mainstream in this world yet. It’s only natural that she might not know. But I couldn’t help but say it. I remembered how I couldn’t argue back in my previous life and regretted it.
I left the room with Ati in my arms, saying, “My clothes are dirty, so I’ll go change.” If I stayed here any longer, it might escalate into a physical fight. I don’t think I could restrain myself.
Ati must have been scared by my strong tone. She silently clung to my neck, as if telling me to cheer up. So, I entrusted her to the Head Nanny (Maggie), who was waiting outside the room.
Unable to suppress my anger, I took deep breaths to calm myself as I returned to my room.
The housefolk were in a great panic because of what I had done. The Great Madam had apparently made it clear that she didn’t want to see me because it made her feel ill. After cooling my head in my room, I was ready for a second round, but that didn’t happen.
Instead of me, the Head Butler, the tutor (Samuel), and the Head Nanny (Maggie) accompanied Ati and spent time with the Great Madam. Ati apparently reported many things diligently, such as what she usually does, what her new mother is like, and about the Surprise Party the other day.
Ah, I can picture it. Her cheeks flushed red with excitement, trying her best to report everything so cheerfully. I wish I could have seen it. Well, I guess I have no one to blame but myself.
Even when the Marquis returned, I wasn’t called. In the end, I was forbidden from leaving my room until the Great Madam left that day. I couldn’t help it when the housefolk begged me, “Please, just stay quiet.” I overheard the housefolk gossiping that it was rare for the Great Madam to leave so quickly, as she usually stayed overnight.
She must have really hated being under the same roof as me. Hmph. Same here.
That night, after dinner, I was summoned by the Marquis. It’s probably a lecture. The Great Madam must have complained to the returning Marquis about how inadequate I am as a wife. How annoying.
“Excuse me.” When I entered the Marquis’s study, he was gazing at the darkness outside the room with a glass of wine in hand. Oh, how unusual. I guess he’s done with work for today.
“I heard you’ve already caused trouble.” The Marquis glanced at me as I entered the room and sighed deeply, saying that as the first thing. Maybe the housefolk also snitched on me. Well, I have no regrets. I’m not even sorry. Ah, well, I’m a little sorry for scaring Ati. I should have been more cheerful when I was being venomous.
“…Selene, I love you.” What’s with that preamble? I don’t need it.
“However, I cannot forgive you for insulting my mother.” I wonder what kind of complaints he heard. I didn’t insult her at all.
“Also, I heard you belittled my mother’s position. Even if you are my wife, you must be mindful.” The Marquis said, holding his head slightly.
He must have been told something even worse. I’m grateful that he’s not just relaying everything as a messenger pigeon. But.
“With all due respect, Tsanis-sama.” I don’t like being told whatever someone wants one-sidedly. Especially if it’s different from the truth.
“I did not insult the Great Madam, nor did I belittle her. I simply stated that I could not accept her trying to impose her ideas on me, as they differ from my own.”
Well, I guess the act of talking back itself counts as “belittling” her. When I said that, the Marquis completely covered his face with one hand. I wonder if he’s lamenting his position, wondering why he’s surrounded by such women.
“…Please, give me a break. Why do you always stir things up like this…” The Marquis said in an exhausted tone and downed his wine in one gulp.
Well, indeed? Certainly? Noble daughters and noble wives are said to be best when they are chaste, graceful, demure, modest, cheerful, and always smiling silently, right?
I can’t help it because I don’t want to be like that. If you want a woman like that, find another one. I’m not a woman who can stay silent.
“It’s not like I’m saying this because I like to. I’m refusing because you’re forcing things on me that I can’t accept.”
What’s wrong with that?
“You should just swallow it down and stay silent in that situation.”
“I can’t swallow it down when I’m told to ‘produce a boy’ in front of Ati.”
“That’s not particularly strange—”
“Tsanis-sama, are you also going to say something like that?”
Perhaps sensing the change in the air around me, the Marquis gasped and stopped talking.
“Regarding children, did the Great Madam say something to you?”
I asked the Marquis slowly.
The Marquis shook his head slightly.
I guess the Great Madam wouldn’t tell the Marquis.
Well, that’s probably right.
“As I said before—”
I opened my mouth, adjusting my posture languidly.
The Marquis’s shoulders trembled.
“I’m not a baby-making doll.
If you want a boy that badly, then find a chaste, quiet, obedient woman who can smile no matter what you say and pop out children until a boy is born.
However.
I’m taking Ati with me.
I can’t leave Ati in a house that unconsciously treats her like unwanted baggage.”
If Ati’s dignity is going to be killed, I’ll take Ati and live in the mountains.
I’ll abandon the secular world in the mountains and live by hunting. Even if life becomes inconvenient and we struggle to eat, no one will deny our personalities.
For Ati’s sake, I’ll hunt down the Bears in the mountains.
I left the room quickly, having said everything I wanted to say, leaving the stunned Marquis behind.
How irritating.
Seriously, how irritating.