Chapter 3: The Kodoku Banquet and the Unpalatable Man, Part 3
It was Lieutenant Krimine, more so than I, who was startled by the sudden proposal.
“Me, sir!?”
“Yes, you. You’re quite petite, aren’t you? The poison will likely work better on you than on that Lieutenant over there. Probably better than on me, too.”
It was true that for the same amount of poison, a heavier body weight was advantageous for survival. Lieutenant Krimine was only about 150 centimeters tall and weighed less than Lord Griem.
Lord Griem looked at me with a triumphant expression.
“A dose you might withstand, this lieutenant surely cannot.”
“With all due respect, sir, the duel is between this humble officer and yourself. Lieutenant Krimine is merely a witness.”
“Of course, the duel is with you. But you are certain to win, are you not? In that case, there should be no issue if she consumes your share.”
What a pain… Oh well, fine.
“That’s true, I suppose. Lieutenant, eat it in my stead.”
Lieutenant Krimine’s eyes went wide, but then she seemed to recall that she was a soldier.
“Y-Yes, sir! If it’s an order!”
“My apologies. If the poison gets you, I’ll grant any last wish you have.”
At that, Lieutenant Krimine’s face flushed slightly, and she snapped a crisp salute.
“If that’s the case, then I’d be delighted.”
Seeing this, Lord Griem burst out laughing.
“Haaahahaha! As expected of the much-feared Death God Battalion! To think you’d use your own subordinate as a disposable pawn!”
“She is no disposable pawn, sir. The one dying today is you.”
Wanting to get this farce over with quickly, I handed Lord Griem a pair of silver tongs.
“There are twenty-four baked sweets in total. Both parties, please designate the first one you will eat.”
“Very well.”
Lord Griem smirked and began to carefully scrutinize the sweets.
“Baked sweets, you say? This means the poison won’t lose its potency even when heated. Furthermore, to be concealed in such small confections, it must be an exceedingly potent toxin. Am I wrong?”
As Lord Griem looked at me with a smug face, I replied as impassively as possible while pouring tea.
“I am under no obligation to answer. The duel has already begun.”
“Hmph, I can see your inner panic, can’t I?”
Grinning, Lord Griem compared the sweets.
“A crescent moon on the Black Knight’s side… Duke Kaisers’ crest. This depicts the situation after the Fourth Great Campaign, doesn’t it? He defected from the White Knight’s side, after all. His mother was poisoned… Hmm, this seems rather meaningful.”
What a long-winded old man. But the more he agonized over it, the closer his death approached. Best to just let him be.
However, he suddenly shrugged.
“…No, the crests are a diversion. Merely made to look plausible to confuse me. In that case, I should simply have your young lady there consume what I would likely choose.”
Without hesitation, he selected a fish-shaped cookie from the White Knight’s side.
“You take this. And I shall have this one.”
The one he chose was a cookie shaped like a tower.
“Let us partake of Duke Bachellum, who, defeated in battle, died drinking from a poisoned chalice.”
Lieutenant Krimine took the designated fish cookie and glanced nervously at me.
“Is this one… safe to eat?”
“Now, who can say…”
My face was deadpan. Lieutenant Krimine, looking dejected, popped the cookie into her mouth and ate it.
“If I die, I request that you, Lieutenant-dono, attend the autopsy.”
“Understood.”
I nodded and then addressed Lord Griem.
“Then you, too, shall eat yours.”
“Hmph.”
Lord Griem picked up the cookie with his wrinkled fingers and crunched it down. He seemed confident.
Let’s keep this pace.
“Now, please select the next sweet.”
“Hmm. Well, hold a moment.”
Lord Griem took a sip of tea and folded his arms.
“Now then, which to choose? I am rather eager to see the young lady writhing in agony. So, let’s make a rather sharp move, shall we?”
He selected a black, leaf-shaped cookie.
“A willow leaf is Duke Fentinen’s crest, but this one is unusually thick. It appears to have been deliberately made so, to conceal something within. I shall give this to you.”
“I… I understand.”
Lieutenant Krimine gingerly picked up the cookie.
“Ugh… I… charge forth…”
Munching on the cookie, Lieutenant Krimine swallowed it with a gulp.
Then, she looked up at me.
“Lieutenant-dono, there was something bitter in it. I might really be dead this time.”
“Rest assured. It takes time for the symptoms to appear.”
“What part of that is reassuring!?”
I casually ignored my subordinate’s shriek and prompted Lord Griem.
“Then you as well.”
“I shall choose this one.”
Lord Griem selected a white cookie shaped like a frog.
“A toad crest is in rather poor taste, but it’s said that witches use them as ingredients for their poisons. You likely thought I would flinch if it appeared obviously poisonous, but…”
“Just eat it, please.”
This is a waste of time.
Lord Griem ate the cookie with a dissatisfied expression and washed it down with tea.
“But these are truly awful. Couldn’t you have prepared something better?”
“My apologies. I simply didn’t wish to use public funds on something for a mere condemned criminal and this humble officer to consume.”
When I told him the honest truth, Lord Griem snorted.
“Trying to anger me and cloud my judgment is useless. However, this is tedious. Shall I choose the remainder all at once?”
“Feel free to do so.”
When I readily agreed, Lord Griem selected ten cookies from the remaining twenty.
“These are my share. The rest are for you.”
“Y-Yes, sir…”
With a tense expression, Lieutenant Krimine took the cookies and began to nibble at them with her front teeth.
“Lieutenant-dono, how many of these actually contain poison? Won’t we both end up dying?”
“If we both die, then the mission is accomplished.”
“Ugh… you demonic superior officer…”
Insulting a superior officer is grounds for imprisonment, you know.
The exceedingly awkward tea party continued for a while longer, until all the prepared cookies had found their way into our two stomachs.
Wiping his mouth with a napkin, Lord Griem sighed.
“Good grief, those were some thoroughly disgusting sweets. Prepare some more decent implements next time. And next time, Lieutenant, you’ll be the one eating them. I’m starting to want to kill you.”
Next time? I couldn’t help but chuckle.
“There will be no next time, sir. The execution has been carried out.”
“What…?”
With a clatter, Lord Griem shot up from his chair.