Does a bird desiring freedom long for a cage?
“Okay, this is my room.”
“…Excuse me.”
After finishing dinner and getting ready for bed, I was invited to Aina’s room.
Dressed in orange-based floral pajamas, Aina made my heart pound uncontrollably. No, that shouldn’t be a strange feeling. It’s partly because she looks so different and relaxed compared to her school uniform, but also because I’m in her room.
“Ahaha, don’t be so stiff. You won’t be able to sleep like that, you know?”
Even if you say that…
I tried to calm my nerves by recalling what had happened earlier.
I thought it during lunch, but dinner was such a warm time.
They said they never eat out and always have dinner at home. Since their husband passed away, they hadn’t had dinner together as a family of four at night, so with me joining them, they decided to have a hot pot.
I wondered if I should intrude on such a moment, but Aina, leading the way, gave me a reassuring smile, telling me not to worry. So, I ended up having dinner with them around the pot, talking about various things… It was a truly nostalgic warmth.
“Here, Hayato-kun, sit down, sit down.”
“O-okay…”
Called by Aina, I was forcibly pulled back to reality.
The room was clean and well-maintained, truly a girl’s room. The desk was a bit messy, but the many dolls on the bed were very endearing.
Not wanting to just stand there, I sat down on the cushion prepared for me.
“Is this your first time in a girl’s room?”
“…That’s right.”
“Hehe, so that means I’m Hayato-kun’s first!”
First… don’t say it in a way that invites misunderstanding.
But maybe, am I this flustered because I don’t have a girlfriend? If I had a girlfriend or was used to women, would I be able to maintain my composure in a situation like this?
“…Ehehe.”
We were both sitting on the floor, and Aina was resting her chin on her hand, leaning on the table. She was smiling at me so sweetly… she’s really cute. Watching Aina like that, I unconsciously let out a big yawn.
“…Fwaah.”
It was a pretty big yawn, so maybe I was more tired than I thought, with all the tension and everything.
“Well, it’s already ten o’clock. And… you’re probably tired, right? Hayato-kun is staying over tonight, but we kind of forced it on you. Sorry.”
“Ah, no, you don’t need to apologize!”
That’s right, there’s no need to apologize.
It was decided suddenly, and I was… actually a little troubled, but I knew that their suggestion was out of consideration for me. I don’t have a family, so they were trying to fill that loneliness, and I understood that well.
“…It’s originally my fault for talking about my family.”
As I said that, Aina reached out her hand in a flash.
She wrapped both hands around mine… warm, her hands were very warm.
“Even so, I’m glad I know. Hayato-kun said you don’t need any thanks, but I thought I could repay you for being like that.”
“…I see.”
“Yeah. So it’s okay… it’s alright. We’re here from now on.”
…………
This is bad, I feel like my face is burning up right now. I don’t know if it’s completely red, but it probably is. Aina probably noticed, but she didn’t say anything, and I was grateful for that right now.
Still, “We’re here from now on”… huh. This is bad, I can understand that I’m happy about that. I’m even thinking that I don’t want to let go of the warmth I feel from her hands.
“Hehe, let’s lay out the futon for now.”
“…Ah.”
At Aina’s words, the tension I had been feeling until just now returned, blowing away the pounding in my chest.
It was already late at night, which was one of the reasons Aina had asked if I could sleep. Including the cleaning and other circumstances, I ended up sleeping in Aina’s room. Aina was the first to say, “Let’s sleep in my room,” and Arisa and Sakina-san didn’t say anything in particular and nodded in agreement.
No, I thought, is it okay to leave a young man and woman alone… even though I’m in a position like their benefactor, their excessive trust feels a bit heavy. I absolutely can’t betray them, I strongly told myself to have a heart of steel.
“I’ll lay it out.”
“It’s okay, I can do it.”
No, no, I’m staying over, so I want to at least do that much.
I was about to head to where the futon I had brought was placed, but it seemed my leg had gone numb more than I thought.
“…Ah, whoa!?”
“Eh? Kyaa!?”
I tried to stand up, but I tripped over my leg and ended up falling on Aina. In a flash, I put my body under her to protect her from getting hurt.
“…Sorry, are you okay?”
“Yeah. I’m fine, but…?”
I was relieved that she didn’t seem to be injured.
But Aina stopped talking, looking somewhat blank. What on earth, I thought, and then my consciousness focused on something incredibly soft that I felt in the palm of my hand.
What happened was simple.
My left hand was grabbing her full chest. A soft and warm sensation, my fingers gently sinking in, but there was also a resilience that pushed back.
“S-sorry!!”
I did it, I thought, and immediately let go of her and moved away from Aina. I was trembling, wondering what she would say, but Aina just chuckled. As if she didn’t care about having her chest touched, she just smiled at me, watching me panic.
“Ahaha! Hayato-kun, you’re too flustered. I won’t get angry just because you touched my chest, you know?”
“…Is that how it is?”
“I don’t know about anyone else. Hehe, why don’t you try groping them as much as you want?”
She unbuttoned the top of her pajamas with a snap.
Her cleavage was exposed, quivering. I quickly averted my gaze, noticing a small mole on the inside of her left breast.
“…It’s okay, if it’s Hayato-kun――”
“I heard a loud noise, did something happen?”
Just as Aina was muttering something, Arisa came into the room.
Far from her usual cool impression, she was wearing pajamas with a close-up of a hamster’s face, and I felt like I was seeing a savior.
“…Too bad. Sis, bad timing!!”
“Hmm?”
It’s natural that she doesn’t know what happened. But the way she tilted her head, looking puzzled, was very cute. But… why did Arisa bring a futon?
“I’m sleeping here too. I told Aina.”
“…Eh?”
“Yeah. We’re sleeping here with Hayato-kun tonight, the three of us, okay?”
…………
And then, before I knew it, the futons for me and Arisa were laid out, and Aina, wanting to sleep together even though she had a bed, also laid out her futon.
Three futons neatly lined up, a row reminiscent of the kanji for river.
“I’ll turn off the lights, okay?”
“Okay.”
“…………”
The three of us lay down, and Aina turned off the lights.
The feeling of someone being nearby, the sound of the futons rubbing against each other, was strangely lingering in my ears. Even the ticking of the clock was bothering me, and I was panicking inside.
“…Sigh… hah.”
I took a deep breath to calm myself down.
Fortunately, sleepiness soon came over me. Come to think of it, I’ve been sleepy since earlier. I had forgotten about it because of my interaction with Aina.
“You were sleepy after all.”
“Well, it’s time for me to sleep too, not just Aina.”
“You make it sound like I stay up late…”
“Don’t you?”
These two are really close.
…Ah, but that’s right. I had forgotten in the tension, but it’s been a while since someone was by my side at night. More than that, I haven’t stayed out, so I’ve always been alone at night. When night comes, I’m alone… I’ve always been alone.
“…It was sudden, but thank you so much for today. I feel like I remembered the warmth of a family after a long time.”
Sleepy… I relaxed my body.
“It’s okay. Good night, Hayato-kun.”
“Rest easy. Good night, Hayato-kun.”
Hearing the voices of the two from both sides, I fell asleep faster than I thought.
Just before my consciousness completely sank into darkness, I felt both of my hands being wrapped in something.
“From now on, always.”
“We’ll be by your side.”
There are many forms of love.
Pure, or accompanied by fear, self-centered, and various others.
Amidst all that, the love directed towards him is so profound, so heavy, a bottomless swamp that makes you want to drown. It’s a love that unknowingly seeks to fill the missing pieces in his heart, a love that binds him, even without the girls intending to.
What happens when those who seek love and those who try to give it collide? The answer is simple.
They blend together without resistance.
[Afterword]
I’ll do my best to write a love that makes you want to drown, rather than a scary love.