Chapter 5: I Liked You
As I spoke, Mika’s face crumpled as if she were holding something back, and eventually, she burst into tears, her voice breaking.
“Mika…”
All I could do was hand her a handkerchief and wait for her to calm down.
“Please don’t cry too much.”
The handkerchief I offered quickly became heavy with her tears. In moments like this, I wondered how I would have reacted back in my old life. All I could do was wait for her to find her composure. During that time, thoughts that led nowhere swirled endlessly in my mind.
After a while, Mika managed to stifle her sobs, though large tears still occasionally rolled down her cheeks.
“I hope you can take your time to calm down. So, until then, please listen to what I have to say.”
Mika nodded earnestly at my words.
“I told Ange this too, but we can never go back to how things were. Still, if we can accept each other, I think it would be good to settle everything and start building a new relationship from here, one step at a time.”
This was my genuine feeling at that moment. I would continue to remember those days, just as they would remember what they had done. The path ahead would not be easy. Unlike Angelica, Mika…
“Well, that’s why I’m counting on you.”
Mika took my outstretched hand and clasped it with both of hers, as if seeking reassurance, as if craving warmth. With her tear-stained eyes fixed on me, she opened her mouth.
“Ichiro…”
She called my name.
“I… I like you—”
In that instant, time felt like it could stretch into eternity.
“You like me?”
“No—”
Mika looked down, shaking her head two or three times as if to shake something off.
“More importantly, the country and the church are expected to finish dealing with the Sealed Domain in about a month. You might have heard this from Anon or Pulmy, but once everything is settled, the members of the former Hero Party will be summoned by royal decree.”
As Row, I no longer needed to appear before them. Those who knew my true identity would likely keep quiet if I asked them to. More importantly—
“Mika, you’re going to respond to that summons, right? What will you do after that?”
I couldn’t help but ask. The resignation I sensed from her was likely tied to that.
“I think I’ll go to a secluded monastery at the northernmost point.”
Though I had somewhat anticipated her response, the mention of “northernmost” left me speechless.
“Lord Yamada, you are a kind person. To forgive us after everything we’ve done… But atonement isn’t just about receiving forgiveness and calling it a day.”
“But I’m saying it’s okay—”
“I cannot forgive myself.”
Though her voice was not loud, it was crystal clear, cutting through my reasoning.
“Lord Yamada, you are endlessly kind. Your presence is warm, like a ray of sunshine.”
Mika smiled softly.
“If I were to be forgiven as you say and return to my daily life, the weight of my guilt would eventually erode and disappear without me even realizing it.”
I sensed a determination behind her smile. But what could I do? Should I foolishly plead, “Don’t go”?
“To live in peace, to meet you occasionally, to chat happily, to share the sweet treats you make, to laugh together over trivial matters, and sometimes to explore together again, leaning on each other’s backs as we face danger…”
She must have been reminiscing about the times we shared. Those moments were irreplaceable treasures for both of us.
“Oh, how happy I would be if we could do that.”
Yet, ultimately, our conversation remained at an impasse. I had accepted her apology, while she could not forgive herself. I couldn’t change her resolve. She would head to the monastery and spend her life there, while I would continue living at Hidden Mountain.
From now on, our lives would no longer intertwine. Just thinking about it sent a sharp pain through my chest. Was this pain something I had to bear?
As I left the lodging where Mika had been staying and wandered aimlessly, I ran into Ash. Upon noticing me, she rushed over, touching me here and there to check on my well-being.
Despite her cheerful demeanor, she informed me that preparations for the celebration of the Sealed Domain’s defeat were already underway, and it was set to be a grand event for the entire town. Naturally, the costs would be covered by the Guild and Lord Bordaf.
As Ash explained, I found myself being pulled along by her. Our destination was the largest eatery in town.